Sunday, June 28, 2009

living the dream...

<----------my drafting table, how i love thee!!!!!-------
since i was a wee little girl i have loved to draw. my father would bring home scratch paper from the office for me. i would sit for hours, filling the pages with adventures, great and small.
my dad told me recently that i still have what he called and still calls my "forever-ever" box in his garage--a HUGE cardboard box stuffed with thousands of my scribbles from childhood. i think it's really tender and sweet that he never threw that shit out.
i've always been figurative with my art, drawing adult people in particular...i cant draw a dog worth shit, and even my human babies end up looking like creepy 50 year old men who are two feet tall....and speaking of men, i would ONLY draw men, up until high school. i would draw men camping, and fighting, and super heroes, gladiators, aviators, circus conductors, prison wardens....
i never drew women when i was young. i tried once or twice but i hated it. they looked like freaks of nature. it was men that i loved, men that i loved to draw. i believe now there was something psychologically fucked up about it...or very natural.
i finally began drawing females when i reached high school....and now, most all of my drawings, even when i draw men---they either look like women or are super androgynous.
needless to say, as a child it was one of my dreams to someday be a young adult, living in a loft, sketching at a drafting table above a busy street, sipping some java or vino with edith piaf or some sort of heart breaking operatic score playing in the background. (either that or buried in books piled 15 high at a desk of mahogany with one of those little green lamps, puffing on a pipe sherlock holmes style)
there are few things more romantic to me, than an artist crouched over said table doing said craft of some sort.
i realized recently that these days, these very days, i am already living this particular dream.
what the fuck. gawd damn im already here and i didn't even know it.
now to draw MORE...DO more, and maybe get some gigs.
what dreams are you currently living out? tell me.

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